Things That Make Me Take Pause

What would you do with 895 million dollars? I know what I would do. Any damn thing I wanted to. For as long as I wanted to. I don't think I have seen a lottery reach that high, and the chances of winning are 1 in 176 million? (maybe it's 126 million, anyway its nothing but luck). Back to tonights magic number. 895 million dollars. If you owned a company that showed a profit of 895 million, after all the lights have been paid, your employees have been paid and all your equipment has been paid for, the bottom line, as it were, 895 million dollars in one year. That would make you happy wouldn't it? I think if I could do that I would only work that first year and sell out, then retire to my private island with my assistant, Bubba.

Would you possibly reward your employees with an increase or bonus, for performing their job at such a high level that you exceeded your expectations. Take pause. Let's make it even more interesting. Let's say that your compny posted these numbers as total profit for the quarter of the year. Three months net profit of 895 million dollars. Imagine that, every three months you profit close to a BILLION dollars.

The company I work for did that today. Posted a net profit for the second quarter of 895 million dollars. This is the same company that asked us to turn over uneeded copies and make new copies on the other side of the paper. GLOOM/DOOM! No one in my company was offered an incentive bonus this year, because, "Times are tough." "With this new business unit we will position ourselves to continue to lead our industry." "We appreciate your understanding in these trying economic times."

Take Pause.

Do you know what it costs to be the primary sponsor on a Nascar car? In 1995 it was 15 million a year. Now it runs between 20-22 million. This includes the driver's salary which runs around 1 million a year. Let me get this straight.... You are paying a nascar driver a million dollars a year to do nothign more than use up tires, fuel, and body work.... that has NEVER even won a race. Win, my bad he can't even finish in the top 5. So in other words, here's a company employee who does his job half way, rarely completes his work asignment, and has a terrible habit of destroying company property. Its enough to make me want to call the ethics hotline and tip them off. The guy is obviously slacking off and definately destroying company goods.

In spite of our nascar driver's efforts, the company still made a profit of 895 milion This makes me take pause because all I ever wanted was that huge increase of around 45 cents per hour. I don' think it would break the bank... not by a long shot.

Ask me about smoking in public, I can't wait to get that started.